Welcome.

Of late I’ve read or otherwise come across content that has repeatedly said that our prayers, as believing Christians, are not transactional.

Despite doctrinally based, correct parental teachings and my own efforts to understand, live, and apply gospel principles, I didn’t have that understanding as a child and teenager. In fact, I thought prayers were very much transactional well into adulthood.

I guess I had that perspective because of what I thought I understood from holy writ – much of it coming from the Gospels.

“Say unto them, Ask of God; ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you. For every one that asketh, receiveth; and he that seeketh, findeth; and unto him that knocketh, it shall be opened…” (Matthew 7:12-13, JST)

“…ask, and ye shall receive, that your joy may be full…” (John 16:24)

“Therefore I say unto you, What things soever ye desire, when ye pray, believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them…” (Mark 11:24)

“And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive…” (Matthew 21:22)

These words felt very transactional to me. I do my part. God does His. We have an exchange, an interaction, an agreement of sorts – made sure by my obedience. After all, He’s promised that He is bound “when we do what [He says].”  (Doctrine and Covenants 82:10) So I believe. I have faith in Christ. I pray. He grants what I want and/or feel I need.

Except when He doesn’t.

Then what?

We learn that our prayers aren’t transactional.

If not transactional, what then are prayers?

They seem to be something God himself inspires. Counselor Brad Hambrick reminded us of this when he wrote,

“When we realize that prayer is prompted by God, we can no longer imagine prayer being impeded from God. We are like Jill talking to Aslan…She got to Narnia by praying to go. When she got there, Aslan (representing Christ) said He had called her. When Jill tried to correct Aslan, he replied, ‘You would not have called to me if I had not been calling you.’…We begin to see that our prayers never leave God from conception to reception.” (Hambrick, B., CS Lewis on God-Saturated Prayer, 9 July 2012)

So if prayer is not transactional, what is it?

A calling, a whispering from God Himself to come, to connect, to commune.

I’ve always loved the Beatitudes. Not only do they mirror perfectly the image of our Lord and Master, but they also empower us in our fallenness as we seek to walk the Chrisitan path of discipleship and duty. I’ve always been intrigued by verse 4 of Matthew 5. “Blessed are they that mourn,” the Master said, “for they shall be comforted.” (See Matthew 5:4)

Mourn for what?

I once heard it suggested for our sins, and I loved that instantly.

For sure, there are many applications and this is most probably not the only one, but I do like it. Could prayer be a special time where we can mourn and be thus comforted? I have wept many a prayer. Sometimes on my knees I have been comforted, and sometimes it has come much later on my feet.

So if prayer is not transactional, what is it?

A time to mourn for our sins, a time to feel forgiveness, to receive the embrace of God in a sweet, healing, and compassionate act of comfort.

“For we know not what we should pray for as we ought: but the Spirit itself maketh intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered…” (Romans 8:26) Footnote d is interesting in that verse. It suggests a comparative word for groanings: sighings. Has the Holy Ghost ever sighed to your soul? He has to mine. No words, no utterance is needed, just a sighing, a whisper, a prod, a prompting. And this, too, during prayer.

In fact, it’s really the only way to pray, and it can’t be rushed or demanded or commanded. He comes gently and when invited by humble supplication. Lest we “ask amiss” to “consume it upon [our] lusts,” we need the Holy Spirit when we pray. (James 4:3)  

And so if prayer is not transactional, what is it?

Moments of sighing from the Holy Spirit who will help us not ask amiss.

“Prayer is the act by which the will of the Father and the will of the child are brought into correspondence with each other,” the Bible Dictionary tells us. (See BD, Prayer, page 752-753). “The object of prayer is not to change the will of God, but to secure for ourselves and for others blessings that God is already willing to grant, but that are made conditional on our asking for them…” (See Bible Dictionary, Prayer, page 753)

In total submission, Jesus prayed in some of his final earth hours:

“…O my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me: nevertheless not as I will, but as thou wilt…” (Matthew 26:39)

Nevertheless.

Two wills merged. Totally. Fully. Completely. Despite the unthinkable price it cost the Son of God. Not to change God’s will but to accept it, to align with it, to do it, to secure the something better blessing He had waiting.

If not transactional, what then in prayer?

The needed Father-child union in preparation for something greater.

I used to believe that I if prayed hard and long and sincerely enough, I would receive. Period. Now I know that God loves me way too much to offer me transactional prayers. What He provides instead is a consistent calling, an embracing comfort – especially when tears gush, moments forever cherished with the Holy Spirit, and a merging of wills for our everlasting benefit.

Unto all the world: If not transactional, then what? Everything for our good.